In November I decided that the first three months of the new year I was going to “take off”. It has been a heck of a year, and well… I think there was wisdom in slowing down a bit. As you may know, when you ARE your business this is not an easy task. The mindset alone seemed almost impossible to “reset”.
Spoiler alert: It’s February eighth and I have learned so much while trying to take time off.
First- it’s a pandemic. It isn’t like I can just go rent a cabin somewhere, leave all electronic devices at home and write the great American novel, or create art of all shapes, sizes, and mediums to my heart’s content. (that sure sounds DELICIOUS though!) I believe some of what brought me to the need of taking some time off is that I was in denial that we were in a global pandemic and I was doing my best to flourish while all the odds seemed stacked against me. I. GOT. TIRED. I am tired. REALLY tired. Yet, here I am struggling to really understand what a break means.
I am learning that sometimes my expectations are not realistic, or perhaps misaligned. My deepest desire was to take time to do whatever the heck I wanted. You know… just rest-Write, make art, watch movies, start spring plants, explore new recipes, clean and organize every inch of my house. You know… slack a little.
Perhaps I have discovered the issue. My abilities do not level up to my expectations. Or perhaps I need a staff. (A staff would be nifty, but likely to be another thing to manage.) I am keenly aware that I have so many things on the desired “to do” list.
The fantasy began in November (to take time off and slack a little), by December I decided to start the 365 Project. This is was part of the initiative to use my talents, my company (Greetings4Good) as an active method of connection. The goal was to send/give a card to someone every single day (thus the 365) for the year. Also, I set the personal expectation of posting about it. This would hopefully encourage others to do the same. This might inspire a greater connection in this really bleak pandemic world.
It’s a great idea, right?
To date 39 days into the year, I have sent 16 sympathy cards (ugh, Covid), 12 birthday cards, 6 be well, 19 notes of encouragement, 3-anniversary cards, 15 thank you notes, and I am not certain how many Valentine’s cards. That is about seventy-one cards (plus).
Most days, I have remembered to post about this on social media. The days I have forgotten, I have started to feel like I failed somehow.
but wait… the goal was to reach out to people, to celebrate life. To share life, good and bad, even if it could only be a card.
Somehow the project had to include the social media piece. (at least in my head) You may have guessed by now, this is what I have wanted to talk about for the entire blog. But why? I suppose that part of me wanted to prove that I was actually doing the project. It was a way of being accountable. It showed an active mission unfolding.
What I have found, however, is that I almost spend more time on photos and hashtags than I do on writing the actual card. That is incredibly counterproductive, and not in alignment with the mission. If I had a staff, I suppose it would be easier. However, I think what this boils down to, is that my goal is to reach out to people (friends, family, and strangers). Period.
This is a very long way of saying that I will still be sending at least one card a day. Yes, I will still try to post about the cards that I write. But I won’t post daily anymore. This is not part of the true mission. This is making it impossible for me to focus on “the break” and frankly, I believe it would kill the project in it’s infancy.
I still hope you feel encouraged to send cards. At this point, the pandemic is nowhere near over. Cards are a sweet and simple way to do that. I am doing my best to honor both my reality and my ambition. (and hey, if you need cards, I know an amazing company that will mail them right to you!)
It’s time for a break. It’s time to be real.
sending you so much love, just like always-
Susan
